My Heart Bleeds For Orlando

I may not be American, I may not be homosexual, but one thing I share in common with everybody else living this tragedy is that I’m human.

I don’t watch the news, I stay away from current events because I can’t handle the pain, the suffering of so many. I can’t support the fact that we watch the news for entertainment purposes, not because it has any accuracy.

I found out about this on WordPress first, but now I’m watching all the people I love watching on YouTube, speaking about this with such pain. Because the YouTube community was also affected by this massacre.


This is Christina Grimmie, she was shot 3 times. She is most well known for her singing, and I believe she went pretty far on The Voice in 2014. She started making YouTube videos when she was 15 years old, she had over 3 million subs and was finally recognised for her vocal talent. I am 25 years old in a month, born in 1991. Christina was born in 1994, making her 3 years younger then me. And in that time she gave back to the community, she donated to charity, started events, she achieved more in her life then I have, then most people get to. And she was gunned down in the prime of her life. She didn’t even get to reach a quarter of a century…

FIFTY people died, this is one of the biggest massacres that has happened for a long while. If I knew every person I would’ve written about all of them.

I could go on about how outrageous and sick this whole massacre is. But this isn’t what this post is about. There is too much pain and suffering right now everywhere, and I don’t want to be part of it.

This is just to say, man, I hope this starts getting people to think, because the world is going in an incredibly scary direction. And at this point of time, while there is so much anger and pain around us, it’s more important then ever to be kind. To be understanding, to be empathetic. The world doesn’t need any more anger.

This is the straw that broke the camels back though. There is still clearly a major fault in our humanity, and that is the ability to adapt to new things. No matter what you believe to be right or wrong is your option, if you don’t agree with gay marriage, that is your opinion, it’s not an incredibly nice or useful viewpoint, but it may not necessarily make you a bad person.

But if you kill, rape and abuse what you don’t agree with in the name of morality/religion/whatever the fuck excuse you have to be a judgemental fucking cunt, then you are the very black and white definition of fucking EVIL.

I’m going to post a video by Boogie, who is my favourite vlogger on YouTube, he sums up all of what I want to say.

To all my American friends, I just want you to know that we are all affected by this event, and there are people with hearts all over the world that are bleeding for all of the people suffering from this horrible tragedy.

This is more then just an American problem, this is the side of humanity that needs to change, and fucking quickly, before we lose this Earth entirely.

In this world and reality, homophobia, racism and sexism are all OLD ideals. It’s time for those old ideals to die. 



8 thoughts on “My Heart Bleeds For Orlando

  1. What happened WAS sick. Make no mistake about that.

    AND…I’m in a morbid enough mood today to point out that however tragic someone’s death is, they no longer have to suffer this life. Maybe – I know it’s a reach, but MAYBE – they were killed now to avoid a larger suffering in the future. I’ve always believed in that old saying ‘only the good die young’. It is we, the living, that we mourn for, not the dead. People lost loved ones. They’ve had this huge chasm open up in their lives unexpectedly. And it’s this emptiness we howl at, trying to fill it with anything we can. The dead don’t suffer.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. They might not be suffering now but how much did they suffer before they died? They left that night to go party and have fun, in no way did they have any clue that that was the last time they had left. They got killed without being able to say goodbye, and that is a tragedy. Seeing your best friends being shot, knowing that there was slim chance of survival, fuck, I wonder what was going through their brains at that moment. How much fear would those people be in? I don’t know, I think I’d choose to continue to struggle on, even though I may not ever have been accepted properly due to my sexual preference then die like that. Death may be a release to people in pain, terminally ill, any other reason you have to want to end your life. I don’t believe for a second that those people are better off now, in fact, those people died with the knowledge that they will always be judged for who they are. At least we get to see any change that might happen. Unfortunately humanity needs an event like this to start feeling any sort of empathy for anything we don’t understand.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You make some excellent points, Kim, and I’m not arguing against any of them. Maybe my statement falls into the category of trying to find something to hold onto when this kind of thing happens, tho I truly do believe that life is hell. Case in point: the manner of their deaths. You’re right; it must have been terrifying to be in that situation. Then again, they never have to experience it again. The people who survived not only have to go thru all of what you mentioned, they may have to go thru it again. They have to live with the trauma and the fear. That’s a damned tough thing to do.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I guess I didn’t truly give enough condolences to the people left behind. But that wasn’t my intention to. It’s sad to think that probably half at least of those people were in the closest, and the way their parents find out they were gay was from their death. I also fucked up with the Christina Grimmie thing, it happened the week before and have nothing to do with it. I feel for them all, but I can’t help but be triggered by the fear they felt before they died. I thought I was going to die once, and then I got let go. I know they’re dead but I just find it really sad…

        Liked by 1 person

      3. It IS sad, Kim. Make no mistake about that. And you show great empathy in your sorrow. Not everyone would have such a strong emotional reaction. I can’t delve into it too deeply myself because it triggers me as well, on many levels. I didn’t know you had a similar situation in your life. No wonder you feel so strongly right now. Be sure to talk to the people you trust about what’s going on with you. ❤ Be extra gentle with yourself, okay?


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