No Soprano Anymore

I’m pretty sure I’ve made mention to it before, but I’ll mention it again. I sing, I’ve had 7 years training and 10 years worth of amateur (thank fuck for spell checker on that one) theatre experience.

It’s something my parents really drilled into me that I was good at, because it was a thing I showed potential in, or so my dad thought, when I was singing the Australian National Anthem, acapella, perfectly in key at the age of 5. I always wanted to be an actor, I didn’t even want to sing at the time, but mum encouraged me toward it because she said it would ‘increase my chances in the acting world if you know more then one talent’. Around that time I was forced into calaesthetics (a mix of gymnastics and dance), which I hated and blatantly refused to do. I don’t dance, I can be choreographed but it takes me a long time to learn.

The dance reason is probably one of the only reasons I don’t do theatre anymore, that and I lost my pure musical theatre voice when I started smoking.

I may not be my fathers perfect soprano anymore, I still feel like maybe my voice has worth to it. I’m a alto belter now, all of a sudden I went from quiet to loud and now it’s hard for people to be in the same room with me when I sing because it’s loud.

I’m posting something I said I’ve been wanting to do for a long while. The clip below is me, all Kim, singing Angel Of The Morning, to the backing track of some shitty karaoke version I found on YouTube. It’s filmed on my iphone, in a terrible camera position which makes the whole look of it downright embarrassing and awkward. I make a few mistakes because in all reality I still do not properly get the bridge, so see me struggle.

I’m doing this because I need to understand what I should and should not put out into the world.

I’m doing this because I would love some recognition, and the thought that the years I spent training weren’t just a waste of time.

I’m doing this to put myself out there, to say I’m ready to face the opinions of others, whether they be nice, harsh or helpfully critical.

I’m doing this to prove to myself that I was a muso once, and I loved it, and the tattoo of the treble clef and sheet music is not obnoxious or a lie.

This is pretty anxiety building for me, but I guess putting yourself out there always is. Keep in mind though that considering this is done on the shittest of shit equipment (as in no real equipment at all) if you need to criticise me on something, please just concentrate on the actual singing.

It’s ok, I’ve spent my whole life receiving constructive criticism without too much praise thrown in so I can take it.

I smirk when I know I’ve hit a bad note or didn’t do something right.

Oh, and if you don’t like the singing, I also made that large dream catcher in the back of the video on the wall.